When Conflicts Arise
Sadly, not all unions will lead to warm and loving relationships. Sometimes a child's parent will not feel comfortable allowing a relationship with a new stepgrandparent to grow. In the best interest of the child, loving the child from a distance is best. Send cards and gifts and telephone the child if the parent permits. Stepgrandparent Linda Mayer encountered this problem with her own stepgranddaughter. Her stepgranddaughter was just 5 years old when the girl moved out of state. "We sent gifts but never saw her," Mayer says. Though Mayer's stepgrandchild lived far away and probably heard negative comments about Mayer, she is close to Mayer today. "She is now 20 years old and close to all of us through her own choice," says Mayer. "I think that being respectful of the touchy situation we had when she was a child, but still offering love and support, brought her to feel that I am her grandmother, too." Mayer hopes her story can give grandparents hope that in the end, if they have tried to maintain a loving and caring relationship with stepgrandchildren, they will one day form their own opinions and embrace the relationship. |
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