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Incontinent Conversations
Talking About Incontinence Among Supportive Friends
By Lyn Mettler
When Bob Peterson, 58, began experiencing stress incontinence, his first reaction was not to tell anyone. However, one day, without thinking, he simply blurted it out to his wife. To his delight, she was extremely helpful, explaining that there were absorbent products he could use and showing him how to use and dispose of them.
While talking with others about involuntary urine loss can be beneficial, for many people it's tough to get over the initial embarrassment of the topic and actually begin the conversation. To start, Bartell recommends that you choose to tell only those people who you feel will be supportive. Then, she says, "It is best to remind yourself that this is nothing you have done. Rather, it is a medical issue, no different than any other medical issue."
That's what Chris Rockhey, 29, who has dealt with incontinence for the past five years, tries to keep in mind. "I try to feel that I just wear a different type of underwear," he says. "People wear eyeglasses to correct shortcomings in their vision. I wear briefs to correct my shortcomings with my bladder, and I have no reason to be ashamed of that."
Rockhey also says that a little humor goes a long way. "I deal with the stress by coming up with jokes about my difficulties," he says. "I find that humor can take the edge off things."
For Behrends, using humor was the perfect way to bring up her bladder leakage issue. "I simply told one woman I work with that I had a problem with going to the bathroom a lot," she says. "I also told her that I may have to run really fast, so get out of my way."